A Gem of an Email

I got this gem of an email. 

"Hey what's up? Your very sexy and i have a thing for women who wear heels like stillettos /strappy heels. Do you wear things like that? I really find you attractive and I'd like to know if u would want to chat more on yahoo or something? Do you have a yahoo name?"

Yea, there's a winner. 

End of November Updates

Hi there. 

So November has been an interesting month. 

Run down of the past week(-ish):

1. No, I never heard back from "Tom."

Most likely we'll run into each other one night and it will be awkward. 

Enough about him.

2. The result of my drunk online dating messaging with the Ginger. He did reply! With this:

"Hey [Me], I think you're pretty cool too and I definitely had fun at homecoming but I kinda started dating a girl a few weeks ago and don't wanna mess anything up with that. :/" 

I replied with this:

Hey "Ginger", 

So there was some liquid courage in that message I sent you last night, if it wasn't obvious. But I will admit, I've thought about messaging you for a while and apparently got enough in me to do it. I got a great laugh out of it today and hope you did too. Thanks for the reply back and good luck with the new chick! See ya around! (Either way, apparently. I have NO idea what I meant by that, nor half of that message.)

3. I've been messaging with two guys, but neither of them have "wowed" me. One I'm attracted to, but he doesn't live near by. The other I don't find as attractive, physically and quickly developing personality-wise, but he lives near by. I might give him a shot, but I'm not expecting much. 

Frankly, I'm very exhausted from all this dating and crap. 

I really have little to no interest to continue online dating, nor dating as a whole.

I'm fine being single and I'm having lots of fun doing my own thing, which is really the most important thing to focus on. 

If someone comes along and wants to be a part of the fun; terrific. But for now, I'm going to just do me. 

It's been an experience, but it's one that I think I've had enough of. 

My subscription ends December 29th to the one site I am currently on.

I deactivated the "free" site because... well, it was free and obviously so by the types of "men" on there. 

Drinking and Online Dating Don't Mix

Hello.

I did something dumb.

I went out drinking and then came home and decided to message the ginger who I met at homecoming.

Here's how it went:

Title: Yo

Message:

Alright "Ginger",

I thought you were pretty awesome when I met you. This whole homecoming/online dating thing is weird, and I honestly will admit homecoming was kinda hazy. Anyways, I thought you seemed like a cool dude n then you popped up as the single out match of the day. I thought I'd go ahead n message you. Anyways, here's an attempt at messaging you. I hate to beat around the bush so here's to cutting the chase. I think you're awesome and I'll leave it at that. If the feeling isn't mutual, alrighty, I understand. Have a great thanksgiving and see ya around either way! Ttyl!

"Me"

Soooooo, he hasn't messaged back. 

I'm still single.

Yea. 

That happened. 

Hand to face. 

WHOAH; pretty much sums it up.

I have an update. 

Yesterday, while sitting at the doctor's office, I was playing around on my phone when all of a sudden it vibrates.
I thought "That's weird. Did someone just try and call me?"

I checked back to my call log and BAM. 

Yes sir, someone sure did. 

"Tom" did. 

I KNOW. I'm as shocked as you are! 

I was quite confused and literally in SHOCK. 

I have no idea if they even called my name to go back to the exam room. 

I was literally sitting there going "WTF?!"

Anyways, he even left a VOICE MAIL. 

I KNOW! 

So I listened to it. It went like this: 

"Hey, [me]. It's "Tom" calling it's about 10 to 4:00pm on Thursday, I wanted to call you n get a hold of you and  see what you are up to and how you've been. I was hoping that we could kinda get together sometime maybe next week, grab a bite to eat or something. Sorry, I've been kinda distant so I just wanted to talk to you about it. When you get a chance, give me a call back or whatever is easiest for you. Alright, talk to you later."

I was stunned. I didn't know what to think and I don't know what to think, still. 

Here'e my problem; guys seem to always do this to me. 

They disappear and then POOF, they come crawling back for more. 

I'm not sure what it is. I've been told I do this sexy lip thing. Maybe its my curvaceous bod. Maybe its my wit and charm. Maybe because I'm just down right awesome. Yea, I'm thinking what you're thinking; it's all of that. (Insert Sarcasm)

Anyways, after confiding in my closest male cohorts, as well as one married chick and one single chick, I decided to do this; call him back. Why? Simply because of curiosity. 

I want to hear what he has to say. I had already moved on from him and accepted the fact that he's just not that into me. I grieved, I wept some, and I ate junk food. All over a guy I saw for a few weeks. Yea, imagine what happens when I go through a break up; not pretty. (Are any break ups ever?) 

So, I finally got around to calling him back. I was prepared to listen and then speak my little mind that this behavior has been crap and I am not a happy camper about it. 

I got his voice mail.

I left a short message saying that it was me, what time, just returning his call, and to give me a call back whenever. Simple and short. Boom. 

About 30 min later, I was standing in the kitchen mixing lemonade and Fire Fly (hey, it was Thursday evening, don't judge) and had the UNC-VT game on. I thought to myself "Hmm, if he calls, would I be able to hear my phone over the tv?" The answer was no, or at least not in time. 

By the time I realized my phone was ringing, I had Fire Fly in hand which I finished pouring (priorities) and then darted across the living room to turn down the TV, which I FOR WHATEVER REASON couldn't turn it down because remotes are my kryptonite. By the time I grabbed my phone, I had missed the call. 

So, I immediately called right back. 

OF COURSE, he doesn't answer. 

Side note: why does this always happen? I think this is one of my top 5 pet peeves, when you call someone, miss it, call right back, and they don't answer. UM, WHY? 

Moving on..... He didn't leave another voice mail and neither did I. About 10 minutes later I decided to just send a quick text, because I was flustered and confused. No response back. 

I'm not surprised because he wakes up at 4:45am every morning and as a result goes to bed around 8ish. 

So for now, I'll wait and see what happens next. 

I'm curious as to what the outcome will be and if he'll get back in touch. 

And also, what he has to say for himself.

Another funny note; one of the sites does "Picks of the day" and I had two VERY INTERESTING picks. 

First up, the ginger. So, during homecoming weekend, I met this Ginger (redhead, for all of you who don't know the term) through friends and we made out a lot that night and ended up falling asleep on the hotel floor together. Next morning was awkward, to say in the least, but we're Facebook friends, so if he really wanted to get in touch with me again, he knows how. Anyways, a few weeks ago, I noticed he viewed my profile on the online dating website. When I logged in last night, BOOM, there he was. MY PICK OF THE DAY. This site really thinks we'd hit it off. Little does it know that we already did. 

Anyways, now he can see that I viewed him, again. Awkward. 

Second, one of my close guy friends was also a pick, yesterday. I sent him a text letting him know that he was one of my picks of the day. He texted back saying that I should click yes. I said I had already clicked no, but thought about clicking yes. In return, I "winked" at him instead. This is all out of fun. 

I'm not interested in him and I think the feeling is mutual. 

We're good friends and that's where it will stay. 

So, yesterday was eventful in terms of dudes. Almost tidal-wave-esque, you could say. 

The weekend came and went... just like "Tom"

Hello folks!

So, I guess to give you the final update on "Tom," is that there isn't much to update since last week. 

I ended up texting him Thursday afternoon and it went like this:

Me: "Hey hows your week going? How'd your weekend turn out in PA? Didn't realize you were going out of town again."

"Tom": "Its good. I'm working saturday 6-4pm for overtime work, kinda sucks. PA was fun I hadn't seen my buddy in forever so it was good to see him. How have you been?"

Me: "That sucks ass you have to work Saturday. This week has been busy at work n prepping for stuff next week so its not too crazy. Other than that, can't complain! 

That was Thursday evening. 

I haven't heard from him since.

Nor do I CARE to hear from him.

I'm very disappointed. 

Not sure where things went south, but they did.

I get it, you're just not that into me. 

Next. 

A week later...

Alrighty, folks. 

I've left you hanging for a week now. 

Here's the situation:

"Tom" and I hung out last Wednesday evening  and things went alright. So I thought, at least. 

Before he had left, we chatted briefly about when we were going to hang out again next. 

It went like this:

"Tom": "What works for you this weekend?"

Me: "Saturday is good."

"Tom": "Ok, Saturday it is." 

Well, then Thursday passed by, no word from him. That's ok. 

Friday passed by, no word from him. Eh, ok. 

Friday night, after a few drinks with friends and hanging out at a local bar, I sent him a text since I was thinking about him: "Hey What are you up to?" No response. 

Saturday: nothing all day. 

Finally, I bit the bullet and sent him a text:

Me: "Hey did you still want to do something tonight?"

"Tom": "Hey I'm in Pennsylvania tonight."

Me: "Oh ok have fun"

I have not heard from him since. 

Not quite sure what happened. 

We've seen each other once a week now for the past 4 weeks.

Been in communication. 

Up until now.

I was quite startled that he was out of town. 

He didn't mention anything about going out of town anytime soon.

He had been out of town the weekend before. 

I was surprised, and still am. 

It's been about 5 days now since I have heard from him.

I don't think I'll hear anything else from him unless I say something first. 

I'm disappointed, mostly because, I thought things were alright and we were on the same page.

Apparently not. 

I'm not quite sure what I'm going to do now.

I've gone back and forth as to whether I might shoot a text his way to see if he still exists. 

However, nothing has been done nor said yet. 

Maybe that's for the best? 

Not really all that much of a happy camper.

The Toilet Situation

So, last time I left you, I was very unsure as to what was going on with my life and quite done with this whole dating thing.

Eh, well I still kind of am, but not. Not everything has gone down the crapper (ba-dum-shhh). Over the past week, there has been more talk between "Tom" and I and it seems to have picked up, again. One thing I think I'm having a hard time dealing with is that things between us are going kind of "slow" for my liking and I've had a really hard time trying to figure out what the hell is going on. But... it has been good for me to be taking things at a slower pace; something that I haven't really experienced with previous relationships.

"Tom" and I have kept in touch over the past week and tried to get together this past weekend but that fell through. Really fell. Fell right down into the crapper. Literally.

"Tom" was out of town this weekend but asked me Sunday about hanging out later that night. I said sure, come on over, and was expecting him almost any minute. Well, a minute turned into several minutes, which turned into a half hour, which turned into an hour, and then hours. That's right; he never showed up. I. was. pissed. Livid, really. 

Back up a few days, I had been wondering just how into me he really is and have had a lot of trouble being convinced that someone actually is attracted to me. This is an insecurity that I've been trying to work on and trying to muster up some sense that someone out there in this ocean, there is another fish that digs this fish, baggage and all.

Anyways, I didn't hear from him the rest of the night. I was really confused, oh yea, and pissed off. Did he decide he didn't want to come over? Did he fall asleep? Did his roommates drag him into something? What the heck is going on? I kinda freaked.

I texted him an hour later asking if everything was alright. Nada.

Next day; generally if I text him late, he'll respond the next morning. However, I didn't get anything. I was even more pissed. I have had this happen to me so many times and have been jerked around so much that frankly, I'm over it. I'm tired of dating, tired of playing games, tired of it all. I was vowing to take a long hiatus from the dating world if I never heard from him again.

So, of course I discussed and digested the situation with my close cohorts. Do I text him again? Do I call him? Do I wait? What do I do? And here is what I decided: to do nothing. That's right, I waited. I decided that if he wanted to come around and explain himself, he can and I will let him know that this behavior will not be tolerated. Otherwise, it's not worth my time and energy to go fishing after him for a half ass explanation.

And that is exactly what happened folks. Later that afternoon, he came around and I got a text from him. And it read:

"Hey!! I dropped my phone in the toliet last night.... I don't have your number [written down, I assume] either and I forgot which apt u are!! Sorry. Just got it fixed..."

Ok, I wasn't sure what to believe. I was like.... really? He dropped it in the toilet? Should I really believe this? This is absurd. What kind of excuse is this?

Then I thought about it. I've dropped my phone in the toilet, and more times than I'd like to admit. I decided it must be somewhat true, and knowing him as much that I do, this was entirely possible and I knew he was unsure as to which apartment I live in.  But I wasn't sure how to respond. So I came up with this:

"Hahahahahahahhahah oh lordy"

I mean, what else was I supposed to say? I could have been a huge bitch and been like "Really? Then prove it." but I didn't want to be like that. I kept my cool.

So, then we texted throughout the evening and the convo went well. I then found the confidence in me to believe that perhaps he really did drop it in the toilet. However, after that evening, I didn't hear from him. Back to being confused.

Wednesday afternoon, I decided I'd shoot him a text. He has been looking for a new car so I was curious if he was successful in finding one. He responded back with that he had found one, but he would text me more after work. And he did. We went back and forth and finally I enticed him to come hang out with watching regular tv and some wine. I think it was more the wine than the tv that got him.

He came over and it was awkward. I opened the door and he walked in. What was I supposed to do? Hug him? Kiss him? Tackle him? Do nothing? So, nothing I did. I had already poured myself some wine so when he got there I poured himself a glass, too.

Then we sat on either side of the couch. Yes, I'm in middle school. I wasn't sure what to do because I was so nervous that he was actually here, living and breathing, in my living room, on my couch. It was awkward at first but I tried to make chit-chat to sound like I was interested in him. After a while, we got more comfortable around one another and things clicked. By the end of the evening we were cuddled up on my couch and watching one of my favorite shows. Overall, it turned into a successful evening.

Lesson learned: to trust more. I think I need to trust in others more, as well as myself. With time, I think this will get better and I'll learn that not everyone is an asshole. Time does amazing things for tricky situations and especially so when it comes to dating and relationships.