Guest Post!

Folks, I've got a treat for you this Friday. A guest post. I've asked this guest, "Matilda" to share her experiences thus far and to begin with a correspondence she had with a young lad. And here it is folks:

Matilda: 

So this guy on [online dating site] that I use messaged me asking the usual A/S/L questions.  We chatted for a bit, I noticed that he was a few years younger but he pointed that out in one of his emails and said ‘I know I’m a bit younger, but I think I am very mature so give me a chance.’  (Just to clarify I’m 25, he was 22).  So we kept chatting, he seemed real nice and from his photos was very attractive.  A few correspondences later he suggested that we exchange numbers so that we could communicate more effectively since neither of us were on match ever day.  I agreed and we exchanged numbers.  A few days later he texts me.  

The conversation went a little something like this:

Romeo: Hey

Matilda: Hi, who is this? … (I forgot to save his number)

Romeo:  It’s Romeo

Matilda: Oh hey!  How’s it going?

Romeo:  Do you know who this is?  Romeo from [online dating site]?

Matilda:  Yes.

Romeo:  Hey would you mind sending me another picture?

Matilda:  Um… sure, hold on.

Matilda: *picture sent*

Romeo:  Is this a joke?

Matilda:  What?

Matilda: Are you talking about the picture?

Romeo: Lose my number.

…and the end.

Needless to say I thought it was quite comical, especially since he was the one who initiated contact.  I guess the lesson learned is not to date anyone younger than you if you are a woman, or if they are an “’attractive’ 22 year old, fresh out of college, and although young, very ‘mature’ for his age.” 

So there you have it; the first guest post from "Matilda." And I assure you, there will be more to come (hopefully), not only from Matilda but others as well! 

Ehhh and guest posts?

So, I have nothing to report on my end. Although my family friend said he'd pass on my number, I have never heard from his friend. So no craft beer for me.

On another note, I have some friends and acquaintances that have been on some awesome dates and/or had some great, and humorous, experiences. SO! I'm hoping to get some guest posts up on here soon! And I must say, they are pretty hilarious, in my opinion, and gutsy too! Hold tight and I hope to report back soon! Or well, someone will!

Craft Beer, Again.

Hello, again.

So I have another update.

After a little over a week, "Paul," the family friend, finally messaged me back to inform me he will be giving my number to his friend. He had nice things to say about his friend "Peter," and said if I had any questions to not hesitate to ask. It was a really pleasant message and kind of brightened my day! So for now, I wait.

I got this message while sitting in the movie theaters waiting for "Titanic" to begin; yes, I saw it once more in theaters to relive my preteen days, and it was just as good. I was excited in that moment when sitting in my popcorn-crusted seat, but then after the movie had ended, I didn't feel that same excitement as before, to be honest. Usually, I get rather excited about such things and for prolong periods of time (days, weeks, maybe months). I kind of am excited, but only slightly. I'm not sure what has gotten into me, but I'm not jumping up and down to see what adventure might unfold. I don't feel that same energy as before when it comes to dating. I just feel kind of blah.

In other news, I have my eye on another lad that I have met within recent weeks/month-ish. However, I decided I'm not going to blog about this one. I have my reasons and if something does come about, perhaps I may blog about it, but until then, I see no reason to get further into details.

I apologize for this awkward, sour-puss of a blog post. I guess it is a reflection of my current "I have no idea what I want in life," state of mind.

Craft Beer

Alright, so here's a better story.

One evening I am sitting on my couch, minding my own business, and I get a ring from the parents. Or maybe I called them, I can't remember. Anyways, my mother answers and she asks me what is new and such, and just small chit chat. However, I could tell there was something on her mind. And then... she spoke....

Mom: "Sooooo Mrs. "Marvel" came over to the house this past weekennnnd, and we were chattinnnng, and she asked if you were seeing anyone! I said 'She sees friends but I don't think she's seeing anyone!"

I said, ".............ok."

Mom: "Soooo she said that "Paul" has a friend who is looking to date! ("Paul" being Mrs. "Marvel's" son who is my age). She said that he's tried those online dating sites but nothing has worked out!"

Me: ".....................ok."

Mom: "Anyways, he's really into craft beer!................ So........"

Me:"............. I like beer."

Mom: "GREAT! I'll tell her you're interested!!!!!!!!!!"

Me:".................................."

Now, I wasn't sure what to think of this whole thing. Although a guy who likes craft beer is just utterly alluring, I wasn't sure how I felt about my mother being so involved.

Me;" Does this guy even have a name?"

Mom:"Oh I don't know, I don't remember. Umm..... uhhhh.... OH! It's uh, 'Peter,' that's it, it's 'Peter.'"

Me: "Um, 'Peter' what? Does this kid have a last name?"

Mom: "Oh I have no idea; I can't remember."

Dad from the depths of the background: "'Murphy!'"

Mom:"That's right! 'Murphy!'"

I'm thinking, how on earth did my father remember this kid's last name? What the hell is going on here? Anyways, we wrap up the conversation and I tell myself don't think anything of it unless my mother gives me a ring back.

A week later, while at work I notice that I get a call from "Home" on my cell phone, but don't answer since I am at work, and if it is an emergency, they know my work number where I'd be happy to answer. So I didn't think anything of it and continued on with my day. Later that evening, "Home" calls me again. It wasn't a good time for me to answer, but I called them back. My mother answered.....

Mom:"Soooo I spoke with Mrs. "Marvel" ............ and uh...... she suggested dinner on Sunday!"

Me:"............. huh?"

Mom: "Dinner on Sunday! What do you think?! Of course "Paul" would be there with his girlfriend."

Me: "Wait.... .......... So it would be me, you and dad, Mr. and Mrs. "Marvel," "Paul" and his girlfriend, and then this guy?"

Mom: "Well, yea, I assume so!"

Me:"...............................................no."

Mom: "Awwww really? Are you sure?"

Me:" Yea................. no."

A few minutes later...

Mom: "Well how are you supposed to meet this guy?!"

Me:"Mom, fate will figure it out."

Mom:"Oh ok."

I don't think I could think of a more mortifying experience of going on a BLIND DATE with MY PARENTS and another set of PARENTS to meet a family friend's friend. I mean, what the hell, why not invite "Peter's" parent's while we're at it?!

Here's a list of reasons I am opposed to this:
1. When I show up at the house, I guarantee my mother would say something along the lines of "You decided to wear that?"
2. Everyone will know why we are there; to set me up with my "future husband." (I'm positive that's how my mother sees it).
3. I won't be able to be myself around everyone.
4. Too much pressure to get to know this guy.
5. My mother would do all the talking and grill this guy to death about his family, where he's from, his education, his job, etc.
6. Too much of an opportunity to be utterly humiliated.
7. The most awkward goodbye ever.
8. My mother harassing me if I have heard from "Peter" and if we have a date planned and then how it went and such.
9. My mother being too involved in my love life for my own liking.
10. Me going insane.

I told a few folks about this situation and they were like "Do it for the blog!" And I responded with "Hell no." Although this blog could have used it, it was not worth it to me to go through all that, especially since I'm apathetic to dating at the moment.

However, I gave it more thought. And here's what I concluded: Mrs. "Marvel" and her family have been close to our family for over 20 years, and if she is willing to suggest a guy for me to my mother, this guy must be alright. I feel as if she wouldn't recommend just anyone of "Paul's" friends and mom's don't just suggest their son's friends to their friends with daughters (I think....).

After a few days, I decided to take matters into my own hands. I decided to message "Paul" on Facebook since we are "friends" on this site. I gave him my number and I told him that his friend can call me if he's up to it since Sunday dinner wasn't exactly my speed. I was very nervous about doing this, but I thought, "Eh, what the hell? Why not? Worst case scenario, I don't ever get a call." And I'm ok with that.

So far, I haven't heard anything. But when I do, I'll be sure to let you all know.

Updates

Several people have asked me what happened to this blog in the past 2 months.

Fine, here's an update.

"Tom" and I still keep in touch. I figure if he wants to see me or talk to me, he has my number and knows how to get in touch. However, I have come to the realization (honestly, although I want to deny it sometimes) that its not going to go anywhere between us. We're in two different places in our lives and want different things. Friendly is going to be where it stays.

Other than that, there has been nothing. I haven't met anyone since giving up online dating, and this is how it works in the real world. I don't have dates every couple of days or every week, and although I do get out there and very frequently, meeting people on your own is a lot harder. So because of that, there are long, LONG, LONG, periods of time where I don't meet anyone. Sorry, just how the game goes. 

In addition, I just don't have the desire to put forth any effort towards someone. Call me jaded, but I've gotten tired of it all and really don't see the point of putting in effort towards a situation that won't go anywhere. I'm exhausted and really don't want to focus any of my time or attention to dating since it doesn't ever seem to end well. 

However, they always say it finds you when you stop looking.

Two different situations. I'll share one here and do another post later. 

I went out for my friend's birthday to a local bar and had myself a pretty good time. It wasn't too crowded so we were all able to mingle and get to know one another. A few drinks later, I found myself chatting it up with this guy at the end of the night. He seemed nice, but I wasn't really 100% drawn to him. As we were heading out, he asked for my number, and I obliged, after he asked me about five times. As we are exchanging numbers, I asked what his name is, and then I asked again, and again, and again. I could not for the life of me remember his name until I went to enter it into my phone. We said goodbye and parted ways. 

The next day, I was looking at my call-log and noticed a missed call from "Aaron" from the night before when we exchanged numbers. I was like "Huh? Oh yea, that guy. Ehhhhhhhh." He just became an afterthought and that was about it. 

The day after that, I was snoooozing away in an afternoon nap when my phone started ringing. It was "Aaron." I was completely shocked while also being half asleep. After I finished my nap, I called my girlfriend to get the 411 on this guy since we had only spoken briefly and I wasn't in a state to really remember anything substantial, not even his name for Pete's sake (if only he were named Pete). I met up with my girlfriend to debrief and found not much other than his age, he has a job, and that he's nice. 

Well I've got news for you; everyone is nice. A few hours later, I suppose his buddy told him I was asking about him, so he texted me. We exchanged a few, and then after I left my friend's place, I gave him a call. Annnnnnnd that's where things were a little different. After only speaking for about 5-10 minutes I realized that this was not the guy for me. Although I really appreciate that he called me first rather than texting, big points in my book (or blog), he sounded like one of the dumbest people ever. Our conversation was lack luster and there was nothing substantial to it. He was talking about the most random things, probably because he was nervous, but still, it was going nowhere. I held out for a little longer until I reached my apartment and said I was going to lose service. So, I said I'd call him back. 

I wish I hadn't. It was another 30 minutes of lack luster conversation that wasn't leading to anything. I finally said "Ok, I have to get going so I can get ready for my week and for bed" (it being a Sunday and all). He said "Ok, call me any time you want." We said "Bye" and that was the end of it. 

Call him any time I want? Buddy, I don't want to call you, I want to see where this goes and actually meet up in person. If you want to talk to girls on the phone, there's plenty of other numbers that provides that service. 

After not being impressed, I decided I didn't want to pursue this any further. He, of course, felt otherwise. The next day he texted me, then called me, and then texted me saying he was going to bed soon. However, I was busy having dinner with an old friend and catching up after too many months passing. The next day, he texted again, 3-4 separate times, and the final text saying to call him that night because he "needs to ask me something." I had enough, and replied back by saying sorry, but I am not interested. It was nice to meet him, and best of luck.

So far..... I haven't heard anything. Terrific. 

It did, however, remind me of the times that I put forth effort into someone and the feelings weren't being reciprocated. Instead of ignoring him and having him continue to contact me, I just decided to nip it right then and there and just tell him how I feel. I felt as if I was polite about it and he got an answer, and we can both move on. If only it could go like this every time.... but it doesn't. And that's when I get to blog about it. 

Stay tuned..... 

Update

I know, it's been a while.

I don't have much to report.

To sum up ladies' night: it was alright. I learned I don't have the game I once used to have. But, I think this is because I am not in a place right now where I want to meet anyone new. Since I'm not interested in meeting new guys, it shows when I "attempt" to talk to them.

"Tom" has sporadically been in touch. It is really not much of anything to post about other than he reaches out to me once in a while. Since he's been slammed with work, we haven't hung out and that's alright with me. Why? Because I'm glad that nothing went any further since he's been so swamped with work. I was in a relationship in which the ex-boyfriend  had 4-6 week periods of non-stop work and I was unable to see him (I know that sounds a little sketchy, but trust me, it is not, I just don't feel like explaining the nature of it). "Tom" is currently too busy to devote any type of effort towards seeing someone (or effort towards me) and I don't want to be a last priority; no one should be a last priority. Like I've said before, timing is everything.

If anything arises, I'll keep you posted!

Ladies' night

Oh yes.... it's ladies' night. 

This little fishy is going out with her school of fine fishy lady friends this evening. 

Perhaps we may run into a school of fine men fish. 

We shall "sea" what's out there in the big blue.