A Message from "Aaron"

I kid you not, I received this message.

"Hey,

"While not being quite sure on the etiquette of [Dating Site], I noticed you on this, so I’ll take a moment to introduce myself to you.

"Recently, I escaped from prison. Now, don’t be alarmed, it was only a minimum security institution. Being a midget made it easier to burrow under the fence and crawl through the pipes and whatnot to gain my freedom. Now that I’m out, I figured it was time to dive back into the dating scene. And let me tell you, dating on the outside is a whooooole lot different than “dating” on the inside. Being a midget fugitive doesn't leave me many options but, in time, I'm sure that you will learn to love me.

"That being said, as you can tell from my pictures, in fact, I am not a midget. Instead, I live and work in the Capital Hill area of the city and have been here for a few years. Recently, I finished up grad school, and thankfully, now have some extra time on my hands. When not stealing tips off the tables at restaurants or throwing sand in the eyes of children on the playground, I'm out with friends, golfing, or sailing. I hope to hear from you.

"Aaron"

"PS. Now, by able to ice skate, are we talking spins and whatnot? If so, I’m not your man, but I did go to that ice skating on the mall once and I can proudly say I spent more time on my feet than on by butt."

I just couldn't find it in me to respond. Something about the mentioning of the midget/jail situation was off-putting. Not really sure what to make of that. Yes, I know he was joking about that (let's hope).